Focusing on what matters to me rather than what is the matter with me. This quote stuck with me from one of the many podcasts I listen to on my morning commute – maybe because at that point in time I felt surrounded by people at work and in personal circles who seemed to have their identities wrapped up in ailments or maybe because all too often I get centered on my own issues? Regardless, this quote made me think about what does matter to me- what is it that makes me tick? If we were to calculate this based on time invested, would that match the ranking I have in my head of what “matters” most to me? All these questions swirling around make me wonder how many of us would be better off if we prioritized our living based on what really matters most. Let’s take that a step further, if I have my rankings of “what matters most” as God, family, friends, work, how does that play out? Especially, if like 80% of Americans we HAVE to spend time working in order to make ends meet! The more I mulled over this conundrum it occurred to me maybe it has more to do with focus, not the activity.
Sure, I spend 70% of my week at work and about 10 minutes or less in the bible, and about two to four hours a week with the family so by a time measurement, work is winning out by far. BUT, what if we weighted the scale? What if at my time at work I remembered to periodically pray for my family and thank God that I’m here to work, thank Him for placing me exactly where He has and ask for His guidance in tough situations – then technically I’m at work all those hours but my focus is completing work through the lens of being a Christian and a mom.
There’s this persona that being professional somehow means masking anything personal and as someone who’s been in the workforce going on two decades, I have found that to be counterproductive. The most challenged teams and difficult people are the ones with walls, the groups too afraid to be vulnerable and grow while the best caliber of colleagues has always been those who are secure in who they are as people and what matters most to them. It takes a very secure person to ask for help or to stand up with courage and say working weekends is a no-go because of family, religious, or community engagements. No one is asking (or probably ever will!), but my two cents is this world would be a lot better off if more people focused and lived by what mattered most to them.
Coffee Time: a noun/verb with the same result 